prayerful of dreams - 2008-06-28
preschool princess - 2008-06-16
life with my sweetheart - 2008-04-29
the fast approach of four - 2008-04-12
lighting up my own life - 2008-03-08
2001-09-29 - 9:48 p.m.
woke up exhausted again, after more dreams about abandoned birds in old, freezing cold ramshackle houses... they are always colourful pet birds trapped in cramped dirty cages, without food or water. Truly horrifying dream, makes me feel so helpless and sickened. I end up in a total panic trying to save them, but this time, i was worried about how cold the house was. All the cages were lined up in dusty little rows, and i immediately wanted a blanket to cover them with. This dream always follows me, whereever i go, although it alters sometimes. Occasionally I dream of leaking aquariums, filled with panicked mewing kittens, and fish free floating in the air. I usually awake with such a feeling of terror and helplessness, but I know I have only my own subconscious to blame. It distresses me even more, to know that somehow I am doing this to myself. I am allowing myself to be tortured by these dreams. why why why ???
old starlight - new starbright
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