prayerful of dreams - 2008-06-28
preschool princess - 2008-06-16
life with my sweetheart - 2008-04-29
the fast approach of four - 2008-04-12
lighting up my own life - 2008-03-08
2001-10-13 - 3:29 p.m.
Bless me Father for I have sinned
I know, I know I promised I wouldn't do it again, but I did. The lustful thoughts were consuming me, and is it my fault that I am so weak ?
I bought 2 cashmere sweaters today. Now I know I can not be as seriously depressed as I thought I was, because I believe shopping shows a sign of personal optimisim. People who buy cashmere sweaters and more Lush soap products than they can use in there entire lifetime, have hope. I think it means I am not suicidal anymore! I mean, I can't off myself now! I have Cashmere sweaters to think about!
I tried to buy only one, the soft cloud blue one, but I could not seem to get away from the idea of how chic the black one was. Alas I hate to be dressed always in black, reminds me too much of that whole Italian side of my mother's family where everyone was in continual mourning. If you wear black for 7 years, chances are, during that time, someone else is gonna kick it, and start off, the eternal loop of mourning. Now here is the part that really sucks, there is no early releasal for good behaviour or serving of consecutive sentences. The image of those black wearing bearded spinsters was enough to send me into convulsions, so I grabbed the blue one just to be a rebel.
In my heart I know I am destined for spinsteriness so I felt that purchasing the black one was as close to spinster chic as I could get.( albeit in the scenario that plays out in my head, I will of course have 17 cats but Damn It!!If I have to die alone, at least they are gonna find me in threadbare cashmere)
Now, even for an obsessive shopper like myself, it is hard to justify the expense of two. I mean, I have to work over 3 full days to earn the money to pay for them. BUT I know I will wear them hundreds of times, so really that is just pennies a wearing, money I could be using to support some ungrateful starving war orphan,one who never writes me a personal letter, just some mass mailing and who will probably grow up to hate me because I got bored and stopped sending my pennies .... blah blah blah.
back to my sweater
henceforth I KNOW that all the great happenings in my future will somehow be related to the aquisition of these sweaters... I have changed my karmic destiny, I can feel it... when I win the lottery and meet the prince of vulgaria who will woo& wed me,and take on my shopping expenses, well, I know it is because of the sweaters)
Now, purchasing these sweaters is also a big personal responsibility. The care required is a major concern. Casual * lazy * people should not undertake such a project, you must be a devoted and loving caretaker to your new sweater(s) You must uphold the belief that they deserve to be treated better than you. This means, you promise to hand wash them, and walk them daily. You will take them to the dry cleaner regularily and not allow anyone to smoke in there vicinity. You will make sure that they are stroked and admired, hopefully when you are wearing them. Also, and this is very important, when passing by another cashmere sweater owner, you will smile knowingly at each other, while conveying " my, what great taste you have! " eye contact. Conversely, when spying the poor slob in the 30%cashmere 70% inferior blend, you will attempt to not be smug, and just smile politely at them. The poor masses do not want your condescending pity.
I have read my cashmere handbook and do solemnly pledge to provide them a good home.
Now I just have to say 3 hail marys and get a second job.
for one brief shining moment, all was right with the world.
I wonder how long this sweater euphoria will last ?
old starlight - new starbright
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