she dreamed the same dream night after night~We are an orchestra of one, we are a majesty unveiling, we are newly born lovers, christening one another with mouths and hands and seeking tongues. We are everything and nothing~ Night is falling. night is falling. and I am drowning. in your arms. I am safe again. I am safe again. You surface me, and cling to me, night is falling and I am in my place again. above you, beneath you, wherever it pleases you so... oh my love, I am home again. My heart has been reborn again. the night is falling. and so am I . Falling for you ( into you, above you, through you). night is falling. night is falling. and so am i. so am i. always for you. for you.

blustarswendy3

~random vintage wendchymes~

prayerful of dreams - 2008-06-28
preschool princess - 2008-06-16
life with my sweetheart - 2008-04-29
the fast approach of four - 2008-04-12
lighting up my own life - 2008-03-08

2002-09-13 - 8:20 p.m.

This morning, I reached into the feathered nest, and found you, curled up, like an early tulip in the late winter snow. Your head nestled softly against the many tiered pillows, and your whole body curved into the warm embrace of several white blankets. The tip of your head, was the only part of you visible, and you had the look of pure innocence, painted on your sunlit face. My hands dipped into the nest and I found the small of your back, and began to rub it, your skin as smooth as silk.

You crawled softly and slowly from the layers of sleep clinging to the last fleeting images of your dreams, and shifted softly into my arms. I lifted you carefully, your weight anchoring onto the wide ledge of my hip, your legs folded like a cricket's around my waist, and your head tucked into the crook of my neck. I could feel your breath warming me, and the lovely scent of your hair, a halo of baby powder clean.

and I kissed the top of your blonde tendrils, and smoothed out your defiant cow lick, with the comb of my fingers. and asked you if you had dreamed any good dreams. You answered in a low throated voice, and nuzzled my neck, like a hungry puppy. You are my beautiful six year old boy, still baby faced, and sweet and cuddly. You love me openly, unaware that big boys are not supposed to be so affectionate. I am your nanny, and you are my heart in the shape of a small child. I have loved you from the moment you were first placed into my arms. You nestled into my neck, in the familiar way, that we danced this morning, and fell fast asleep. and of course I fell madly in love with you.

And on this Spectacular Indian Summer September day, as I drove you to school, you chatted on about all of your plans to save the world. You said that when you are " all growed up" that you are going to build houses, but plan to carefully bulldoze the trees, pausing to check them for nesting baby birds and small animals. You sighed and mentioned that you wished that trees did not have to sometimes die. You whispered to me, " at least, the broken down trees do not go to waste, because they get to be built into houses for people". Alas, you still think it is terribly sad. We speak about trees often, you and I. Sometimes when we walk in the woods, I tell you the stories of all of the trees, that we encounter and you look at me, mesmorized, and utterly captivated by my every word. You are so much of the best of me, that it is overwhelming sometimes.

I look deeply into the mirror and feel as if I am disappearing.I empty myself night after night and wake up believeing I have no more to possibly give.

but then, I see your face.

and in your exquisitely dark lashed, large, china blue eyes, I see the beauty of my once upon a time

innocence, perched in childlike wonderment. Taking flight. I believe so deeply in you. I have given you my all. I have loved you, like no other.

As you were getting out of the car, you hurriedly bent over and kissed me goodbye. and then, as you pulled away, you looked at me, paused for a second and leaned in, and hugged me. It was such a perfectly honest and heartfelt moment, you could feel the love I have for you tugging at your heart. When you were very small, I once smiled at you, and you smiled back, and in your soulful way, you looked at me, and said " I love you too, wendy. " I was stunned. I had not said anything aloud to you, but you could feel my heart covering yours with layer after layer of pure love.

I may not be a mother. and You may not have my eyes. or my smile. But for sure, my darling Austin Boy, You have my very same heart.

old starlight - new starbright

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