wendchymes

she dreamed the same dream night after night~We are an orchestra of one, we are a majesty unveiling, we are newly born lovers, christening one another with mouths and hands and seeking tongues. We are everything and nothing~ Night is falling. night is falling. and I am drowning. in your arms. I am safe again. I am safe again. You surface me, and cling to me, night is falling and I am in my place again. above you, beneath you, wherever it pleases you so... oh my love, I am home again. My heart has been reborn again. the night is falling. and so am I . Falling for you ( into you, above you, through you). night is falling. night is falling. and so am i. so am i. always for you. for you.

~random vintage wendchymes~

prayerful of dreams - 2008-06-28
preschool princess - 2008-06-16
life with my sweetheart - 2008-04-29
the fast approach of four - 2008-04-12
lighting up my own life - 2008-03-08

2002-07-02 - 10:09 p.m.

you destroyed me, but it was I who let you.

Like a child afraid to speak up to a school yard bully, I let you carry on, ripping me apart. I created the voice, inside my head, telling me how ugly and scarred I am.

I am nice to everyone except to the girl I once was. I have nothing to give myself, no energy or ability to care, but I would rise from the dead, to give you a transfusion of my soul. I would feed you slivers of myself, tear at my flesh, if it would shelter you from the cold isolation of your life. If it would nourish you to the core. I would rip out my heart, to let it beat in the cavernous regions of your artic chest. I wish I could absorb all your pain. I would push you out of my hollowed womb, into the bright lights of this world, like an infant being reborn, if it meant you could start anew. I would be your martyr, strap you to my back and carry you through the burning desert, as if saving your life was somehow saving my own, because,indeed my life alone, has no meaning to me, anymore.

You give me a cause to rally for, a reason to want to go on. You are flawed and closed, but in you I have glimpsed true beauty. I flutter my eyes shut to the darkness of night, and it all comes back to me, a careless smile, you once tossed my way, your giant gentle hand clasped in mine, and ohhhh that time, when our intense eyes collided and your breath became mine, the exhale of the warmed inhale, of bodies racing to meet beneath the stars. Shivering into one another , two souls moored together, like ships sailing off into the endless azured night.

I want to forgive you, I want to take on your sins, I want to wash us clean and beautiful again. I want to set you free. I want you to love anew, but I also want you to never forget me. I want you to understand me, in a way that you never tried. You never held me against the light of day. I shine pure and true. The ugliness I became, was handpainted by your lies taking shape in my decaying heart. You sculpted me evil. You never had empathy for what you created in me. The jealousy was a response to the gaping insecurities you clawed into me, as I lay softly sleeping, in your arms. Because, nestled between us, was always the ghost of her, the one you loved, so much more than me. The progeny of this bizarre union spun me bitter and alone.

tangled in a silk web of lies

snuggled into a bed of lust and tears

and yes, there was love

somewhere,

and that is what I want to believe in.

that love slept here.

once.

two hearts laced in time

lovers in a moment

framed infinite in the

endlessness of space

somewhere out there